Saturday, January 9, 2021

Forgiveness: a response to repentance

This observation was made on Sunday, 2017.04.09 but has been lying dormant in my old diary all these four years. At last, today I have found the will to post it on this blog.

Matthew Chapter 18: Forgiveness is a response to repentance.

The preacher in church this morning digressed from the context of biblical forgiveness and dwelt on the issue of "resentment" instead. He spent most of his time elaborating on why we should not harbour resentment against our brother, and how we should deal with such feelings of resentment. 

On reading through Matthew 18 closely, I realise that our Lord is not teaching us about personal feelings of resentment, although resentment may be part and parcel of a Christian's reluctance to forgive his brother. Instead, the forgiveness that our Lord taught in these passages is a response. It is a response to our brother's remorse, repentance, and request to be forgiven.

I feel compelled to write down my observations about the nature of forgiveness taught in Matthew 18 and Luke 17, to point out that our forgiveness of a brother who has sinned against us can be likened to forgiving one who owes us a debt that he cannot repay, who asks to be released from such debt.

In other words, forgiveness can only take place under circumstances where the brother who sins against us asks us to forgive him, as it were, to write off the "debt" that he owes us.

Let us first look at the passage from Matthew 18:21 - 35 ASV,

21 Then came Peter and said to him, Lord, how oft shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? until seven times? 22 Jesus saith unto him, I say not unto thee, Until seven times; but, Until seventy times seven. 23 Therefore is the kingdom of heaven likened unto a certain king, who would make a reckoning with his servants. 24 And when he had begun to reckon, one was brought unto him, that owed him ten thousand talents. 25 But forasmuch as he had not wherewith to pay, his lord commanded him to be sold, and his wife, and children, and all that he had, and payment to be made. 26 The servant therefore fell down and worshipped him, saying, Lord, have patience with me, and I will pay thee all. 27 And the lord of that servant, being moved with compassion, released him, and forgave him the debt. 

28 But that servant went out, and found one of his fellow-servants, who owed him a hundred shillings: and he laid hold on him, and took him by the throat, saying, Pay what thou owest. 29 So his fellow-servant fell down and besought him, saying, Have patience with me, and I will pay thee. 30 And he would not: but went and cast him into prison, till he should pay that which was due. 31 So when his fellow-servants saw what was done, they were exceeding sorry, and came and told unto their lord all that was done. 

32 Then his lord called him unto him, and saith to him, Thou wicked servant, I forgave thee all that debt, because thou besoughtest me: 33 shouldest not thou also have had mercy on thy fellow-servant, even as I had mercy on thee? 34 And his lord was wroth, and delivered him to the tormentors, till he should pay all that was due. 35 So shall also my heavenly Father do unto you, if ye forgive not every one his brother from your hearts.

This morning, I would like to point out several observations about the nature of forgiveness that can be made from reading this passage.

(1) Forgiveness is a spoken response rather than a silent reflection.

In the parable of the Unforgiving Servant, our Lord teaches that we should forgive our brother of his debts when he comes to ask for forgiveness. 

While Matthew 18:22 teaches one to forgive a brother "seventy times seven" times, i.e. without limit, the entire parable by our Lord in Matthew 18:23 - 35 tells of asking for forgiveness. In Matthew 18:26, the servant fell down before the king and pleaded for more time to repay his huge debt of ten thousand talents. In Matthew 18:27, the king forgave him. And in Matthew 18:29, the servant's friend fell down and begged for more time to repay his small debt of 100 denarii, but the ungrateful servant refused to forgive his friend.

Asking, pleading, and begging. That is the starting point of forgiveness. There can be no forgiveness without asking. There can be no forgiveness without remorse and repentance. We can see in this parable that forgiveness is a response to someone asking, pleading and begging us.

When we forgive a brother who owes us a debt, whether it is a debt of money, or a debt of having wronged us, who comes to us and asks to be forgiven, we respond to his asking and pleading. 

And this response is a spoken response, when we tell that brother "I forgive you of your debt. You know longer owe me anything." In other words, we cannot forgive our brother silently. Forgiveness is carried out only when we "speak" our forgiveness to our brother. It is a spoken response done openly with our words. It is not a silent reflection done secretly in our own hearts.

And the teaching of our Lord in this morning's passage is this: we must forgive our brother under such circumstances, every single time he comes to us to ask for forgiveness, not only seven times, but even as many as seventy times seven times, even if he goes back to sinning against us over and over again, owing us a debt over and over again.

(2) Forgiveness is an outward decision rather than an inward deliberation.

When a brother comes to ask us to forgive him, his words are spoken audible words that can be heard by anyone present. Likewise when we tell him, "You are forgiven. You do not owe me anything from now on", our spoken audible response is an outward acton that can again be heard by people around us.

Our decision to forgive our brother is an outward decision. It is done outwardly. It can be seen and heard by others.

In the parable of the ungrateful servant in Matthew 18, the decision of the compassionate king to release the servant and to forgive him of his huge debt of 10,000 talents was made outwardly. Most probably, it was done in the presence of his servants who saw and heard everything.

Likewise, the refusal of the ungrateful servant to forgive his fellow servant of the small debt of 100 denarii was also an outward decision. Matthew 18:31 tells that when his fellow servants ". . . saw what was done, they were exceeding sorry, and came and told unto their lord all that was done."

When we decide to forgive a brother who comes to plead with us, it must be an outward decision that can be seen and heard by anyone who happens to be around us. We cannot keep quiet. Our decision cannot be done merely in our heart. It is done outwardly.

Of course there are times when this outward decision to forgive a brother may not be witnessed by anyone around us. It may be a situation of "just between the two of us". In Matthew 18:15 NIV, our Lord said,

“If your brother or sister sins, go and point out their fault, just between the two of you. If they listen to you, you have won them over."

Similarly, in Matthew 5:23, 24 NIV, our Lord teaches us,

"Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother or sister has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to them; then come and offer your gift."

Both going to a brother to point out his fault (so that we can outwardly forgive him), and going to a brother who has something against us (so that we can ask for forgiveness) is mostly likely done behind closed doors in the absence of any witnesses. In such cases, the outward decision to forgive is carried out betweeen just the two of us.

(3) Forgiveness is whole-hearted action rather than half-hearted assent.

It is interesting to note that the Hebrew word for "to pay" or "to make good" is shalam (Strong's Hebrew 7999). This word shalam occurs five times in this passage. In Matthew 18:25 - 35, we read that the servant had no means to shalam his king the huge debt of 10,000 talents, and pleaded with the king for patience so that he could shalam all his debt. Likewise, later he met his fellow servant who owed him the small debt of 100 denarii, who pleaded with him, "Have patience with me, I will shalam you . . .". 

The parable tells us that he refused to forgive his fellow servant, but instead cast him into debtors prison until he could shalam the 100 denarii. Subsequently, the king learnt about this ungrateful and unforgiving servant from other fellow servants, and "delivered him to the tormentors, till he should shalam all that was due".

This parable culminates in the teaching of our Lord in Matthew 18:35 

"In the same way my Heavenly Father will deal with you, if you do not all of you forgive one another from your hearts.", 

The expression "from your heart" can be expressed in Hebrew as "with your complete heart", where the word complete is shalem in Hebrew (Strong's Hebrew 8003). This is significant because it shows that if our Lord was speaking in Hebrew in Matthew chapter 18, he would be saying that you must forgive one another with a shalem heart even if your brother cannot shalam what he owes you. 

Our Lord teaches us that our forgiveness must be whole-hearted. We must forgive our brother whole-heartedly, from our hearts. When we make our outward decision to forgive a brother, when we carry out our spoken response to his asking to be forgiven, we must do so with our whole hearts.

Forgiveness is a whole-hearted action. It must never be mere half-hearted assent.

(Coming up: more about forgiveness and repentance, rebuke and sin, from Luke Chapter 17 . . . )